This weekend marked my glorious, so overdue return to the gym. Originally I had planned on starting back this week but started last Friday instead, because, why the hell not. I've gone 3 days in a row now and although I haven't lost any weight* I feel better and am pretty sure that the girls have already shrunk half a cup size. Sadly, they're always the first to go.
Being at the gym is awesome. I love it. I don't know what it is but when I am at the gym I feel powerful. It's really nice! It doesn't matter that I haven't been to the gym in at least 6 months, I still feel like the shiz. If I was doing yoga on a regular basis I'd feel like a goddess, I tell 'ya. I'm also amazed at how quickly my body adapts for working out again. Yes, I'm sore but in a hurts sooo good kind of way.
Being at the gym is awesome. I love it. I don't know what it is but when I am at the gym I feel powerful. It's really nice! It doesn't matter that I haven't been to the gym in at least 6 months, I still feel like the shiz. If I was doing yoga on a regular basis I'd feel like a goddess, I tell 'ya. I'm also amazed at how quickly my body adapts for working out again. Yes, I'm sore but in a hurts sooo good kind of way.
So if going to the gym makes me feel so fan-friggin-tastic why on earth do I STOP going?? I wish I knew! Apparently something deep inside my self-conscious is a self-destructive little bitch that I am having to constantly fight every day. Sadly, most of the time she's winning and I feel like shit but occasionally something stronger will arise and kick her ass...until inevitably she returns to power and I gain 50 pounds. It's the greatest back and forth battle since....I don't know, some great back and forth battle.
I'd love to be all like, 'But not anymore! Yeah! I'm going to kick that little bitch to hell!" but whatever. Sorry. At this point I have been yo-yo-ing longer than Hiroyuki Suzuki (2102 World Yo-Yo Champion). A big part of me wonders if I'll ever lose the weight I've packed on since having Ruby (not at all her fault), part of me doesn't give a rats ass, and part of me just wants to feel good again, not like I have a Smart Car attached to my backside. okay, so I know my ass isn't that big but damn if it doesn't feel like it's own separate entity sometimes.
Hold up. Can I just say that I confuse even myself? I'm not exactly thrilled with my current physique but at the same time I have no problem wearing a body hugging dress like this. Obviously I was comfortable enough to wear it (and received several compliments which included the words, "sensual" and "luscious"-and not from my hubby) but am still not confident at the same time? What the hell?? Like I said, I confuse even myself.
Sigh.
Okay, so this post is going downhill pretty quickly. It started off as "Yeah, I am going to the gym, I'm going to kick ass!" to "What the fuck is wrong with me??" More than likely the answer to that question will never be found, lol.
So, in conclusion, Yay, I'm going back to the gym and I'm going to try my damnedest to keep going. I've decided that my goal for the year is to lose 30 pounds and once I reach that goal I am going to reward myself with a sweet ass hair dye job (green, perhaps?), something I've wanted for years but haven't done. At 50 pounds I am getting that tattoo I've been wanting, again, for years. This should give me enough time to figure out what exactly I want to get!
At some point you might see the 'before' picture I took yesterday but yeah, first I'm going to need to lose a bunch of weight so that in comparison to the 'before' picture my 'after' picture looks super duper hot. That's right, I'm vain like that. I truly admire those who can just put themselves out there like that but I just cannot...at least not yet.
And I think this post is about done. It's 3am, the laptop is about out of juice, my stomach is growling (STFU!), and I need my energy for that Zumba class I'm taking at the gym tomorrow. Good night!
*Thanks a lot, MEGA STUF OREOS! That's right. Mega Stuf Oreos. Picture if you will 2 double-stuffed Oreos smooshed together without those pesky cookie pieces in the middle. All I have to say is that it's about friggin' time Nabisco! It's basically an Oreo perfected. The only way it could be better is if you coated that bad boy in mint chocolate. Heath and I may or may not have consumed 2 packages in a week. Oh, and curse you Cadbury and your Mini Eggs. I'll be thrilled when these candy-centric holidays have come and gone.
I'd love to be all like, 'But not anymore! Yeah! I'm going to kick that little bitch to hell!" but whatever. Sorry. At this point I have been yo-yo-ing longer than Hiroyuki Suzuki (2102 World Yo-Yo Champion). A big part of me wonders if I'll ever lose the weight I've packed on since having Ruby (not at all her fault), part of me doesn't give a rats ass, and part of me just wants to feel good again, not like I have a Smart Car attached to my backside. okay, so I know my ass isn't that big but damn if it doesn't feel like it's own separate entity sometimes.
Hold up. Can I just say that I confuse even myself? I'm not exactly thrilled with my current physique but at the same time I have no problem wearing a body hugging dress like this. Obviously I was comfortable enough to wear it (and received several compliments which included the words, "sensual" and "luscious"-and not from my hubby) but am still not confident at the same time? What the hell?? Like I said, I confuse even myself.
Sigh.
Okay, so this post is going downhill pretty quickly. It started off as "Yeah, I am going to the gym, I'm going to kick ass!" to "What the fuck is wrong with me??" More than likely the answer to that question will never be found, lol.
So, in conclusion, Yay, I'm going back to the gym and I'm going to try my damnedest to keep going. I've decided that my goal for the year is to lose 30 pounds and once I reach that goal I am going to reward myself with a sweet ass hair dye job (green, perhaps?), something I've wanted for years but haven't done. At 50 pounds I am getting that tattoo I've been wanting, again, for years. This should give me enough time to figure out what exactly I want to get!
At some point you might see the 'before' picture I took yesterday but yeah, first I'm going to need to lose a bunch of weight so that in comparison to the 'before' picture my 'after' picture looks super duper hot. That's right, I'm vain like that. I truly admire those who can just put themselves out there like that but I just cannot...at least not yet.
And I think this post is about done. It's 3am, the laptop is about out of juice, my stomach is growling (STFU!), and I need my energy for that Zumba class I'm taking at the gym tomorrow. Good night!
*Thanks a lot, MEGA STUF OREOS! That's right. Mega Stuf Oreos. Picture if you will 2 double-stuffed Oreos smooshed together without those pesky cookie pieces in the middle. All I have to say is that it's about friggin' time Nabisco! It's basically an Oreo perfected. The only way it could be better is if you coated that bad boy in mint chocolate. Heath and I may or may not have consumed 2 packages in a week. Oh, and curse you Cadbury and your Mini Eggs. I'll be thrilled when these candy-centric holidays have come and gone.
